Monday, September 19, 2011

the emmys

I didn't anticipate writing anything about the emmys this year, because I usually try to save my sartorial wit exclusively for awards season (and snarky comments on the street). But the people have asked, (well, one person) and I have answered! So, one person who reads this post, I hope you enjoy -- and now all the rest of you know how little prodding it takes for me to make fun of the carefully culled wardrobe displays of celebrities.

One of my favorite moments of the night was when the best actress in a comedy nominees were announced and they, one-by-one, walked up on the stage in the style of Miss America contestants -- holding hands, wiping away tears, grinning broadly. Seeing these six incredibly talented, funny, and powerful women on stage was such a strangely touching moment for me, and the way that they surrounded Melissa McCarthy once her name was announced, looks of genuine happiness on each face, topped it off so well. Later in the show, McCarthy and Amy Poehler were presenting the award for best actor in some kind of TV show, they did this great bit about how men in Hollywood were finally getting their moment, moving away from being 'pretty pretty things to look at' and getting roles of substance and character. Loved it.

The Emmys are, in some ways, are actually more fun than a number of the other awards shows. They don't take themselves as seriously, which can be refreshing. Or it can fall flat and feel gimmicky (case in point: the show choir composed of, among others, wilmer valderrama and robin from 'how i met your mother.' I mean, why?!) and confusingly self-referential (the lonely island skit with gyrating wave dancers, michael bolton dressed as jack sparrow, and akon. What does that have to do with television?). But, they laugh at themselves, and I can respect that.

Clearly, though, the most important part of the entire evening is the fashion. And this particular show was nothing more or less than 'meh.' Some cute dresses, some weird ones, and one very handsome Coach Eric Taylor accepting an Emmy in a nice tux and adorably rumpled hair. I will stick to two outfits this time around, although many more deserve a mention, like Julianna Margulies's upside-down-lampshade-as-bustier, Lea Michele's trying so hard to be Somebody that I feel embarrassed for her, Katie Holmes's blue sad sack, or the middle daughter from Modern Family displaying major cleavage at the same time that she is wearing braces. But tonight, we look at two women who are polar opposites--physically, personally, sartorially.

First, let us look at Gwyneth Paltrow, she of the Goop and backyard pizza oven: One word comes to mind, as is so often the case with the lithe blonde actress:
I loved the movie Sliding Doors. I liked her in Emma. But somewhere along the way, our dear Gwyneth became the paragon for virtuous and responsible living. started dispensing lifestyle advice, became best friends with Beyonce (I'm sorry B, you can do better), and became completely ubiquitous in kind of obnoxious ways. I know some people love her and think she can do no wrong; if that is you, feel very free to skip over this part. Because . . . this OUTFIT! If you can even call it that. I really feel like she is trying to send a message with it: "I have flat abs and pretty blond hair that I casually push aside once every three minutes and I know that crop tops were hot on the runway during fashion week and I want you to know that I know that" and on and on and on. "I only eat macrobiotic things and I make cheese out of nuts and looking at meat makes me want to vomit but, you know, it's okay for you because you are not Gwyneth Paltrow and your body is not a temple to the glories of eight glasses of water a day and a diet of homegrown kale."

Moving on . . .

There were a number of ladies in red last night, but none quite so lovely as the inimitable Ms. Winslet. I got to watch the program with one of my best friends, and she and I couldn't stop gushing over how much we adore Kate W, how fantastic a person she seems, how wonderful it is that she, a big time movie star with an Oscar, is not above getting incredibly. jump-around, hug-everyone-else excited that she has won an Emmy! We also marveled at her ability to wear a dress that certainly put her ample bosom on display but somehow still seemed demure and old-fashioned. 

That's all I've got. I need to rest up for February 27, 2012. The world won't have ended by then, right?

1 comment:

Lisa said...

So glad I found this! you're hilarious.